What is Discipline?
- Mike Sonneveldt
- Jul 28
- 6 min read

For a guy who loves discussing the topic of discipline and what it takes to be more disciplined in life, I realized that I had never addressed the question, "What is discipline?"
So for my next circus act, I'll be bringing you a thrilling and semi-short dissertation on "What is discipline?" (Don't get too riled up now.)
It's time to decide: do you want to be disciplined and finish this article, or do you want to quit this, like everything else in your life?
What is Discipline?
Okay, so what is discipline? Really, what is it at the core? A lot of definitions float around, but I've narrowed it down to a fairly simple definition: "When you do what you don't want to do."
The definition matters. If we don't understand the true definition of the word, then we may get the wrong impression of how to approach our lives and the things we want to achieve. All of a sudden, we might be using the wrong answer or solution to our issues and wondering why our lives are going nowhere extremely fast. When we're sitting around, believing we're being disciplined by doing nothing, we may be avoiding the exact thing that will help us make progress.
So, what is discipline? Can we really say it's as simple as doing what we don't want to do?
What is Discipline: Stay Inside the Boundaries
That might be a little easy, but it's an important piece to the puzzle. Discipline is the art of holding to a set of standards, objectives, or metrics. What does that mean? It means painting within the lines. It means staying within the boundaries. If you're walking down the sidewalk, it means walking on that sidewalk and not straying into the road.
However, discipline extends beyond just staying within the boundaries. Frankly, because at some point, in some moment in our life, we will want to walk in the road, paint outside the lines, or go outside the boundaries.
Our natural inclination is to, at some point, not uphold the standards. This is where the art of discipline comes into play. The difference between a person of discipline and someone with no discipline is that moment when the standards and desires come into conflict.
You want to walk in the street, but you know you shouldn't.
Or, more relatably, you want to eat dessert, but you know you shouldn't. We all look at a person who rejects desserts and eats healthy as a "disciplined" person. And rightfully so...they are...most likely.
But what if they have no sweet tooth whatsoever? Should we still consider them disciplined?
Does a person who never has the opportunity or temptation to commit adultery get to claim they are too disciplined to ever stray?
What is discipline? It's that moment at the crossroads when a person has the option to make a choice that goes against their standards and yet chooses the right decision. They prove their character and integrity in that moment.
Knowing the Answer to What is Discipline, Yet Being Mistaken
I think some people make a mistake with the concept of discipline, and I see it happen in the Christian realm a lot.
There is a bit of a utopian belief that we as Christians can and should hit a moment in our life's journey in which we will no longer need discipline because we will never have that tension within ourselves to make the wrong choice.
Yet, Christ Himself sat in the garden of Gethsemane and asked the Father to "take this cup from me." In other words, He did not want to do what He was called to do. His desire showed through. He wanted to escape what He knew was coming. But, at the apex of decision, he proved His discipline. He immediately followed with, "However, not my will, but your will be done."
What is discipline? That moment right there. At the crossroads of desire and calling, Christ chose the proper decision...despite what He felt inside.
Desire is innate in us. It's God-breathed. However, because it is a vastly complicated matrix of conflicting emotions, feelings, and callings bubbling to the surface, we must be on guard that a decision that is proper in one context might not be proper in the next. Discipline discerns what is contrary to our goals/standards, and what decisions will align with them. Strong discipline points to the greater despite the siren's call of the lesser.
Your desire will not necessarily mesh with the righteous choice at every crossroads. We're too complicated for that. So, discipline puts the desires of the person (read: the flesh) into subjection to the will of the Lord (communicated through the Spirit). We are responsible for submitting ourselves to the will of the Lord, even when we don't feel like it.
Those who do not have a faith structure: discipline is forcing your desires to submit to your goals or standards. Aka – I want the pie, but my goal/standard is a healthier weight.
"Discipline is doing what you hate to do, but nonetheless doing it like you love it." -Mike Tyson.
Do What is Hard
This means discipline truly comes into play when we do what we don't want to do or what is hard to us. And your desires may align with the standards or objectives 99.9% of the time. But true discipline shows forth when you take that .01% of the time and ensure that you'd STILL make the right choice.
Here's the deal: nobody is perfect. And some people are truly dialed in with their discipline. However, what is easy for them may not be super easy for you. A person who has no sweet tooth will not struggle with sugar cravings. Does that make them more disciplined than you? Even though they chain-smoke and you've never touched a cigarette?
The level of discipline a person has achieved is based on the adversity or inner resistance to making the right choice, yet they overcome that adversity or resistance.
Your discipline is unique to you. People can give you methods on how to achieve better discipline in areas you want to improve, but the reasons you aren't disciplined and the things you're disciplined about will vary.
And at the end of the day, we know what we should clean up and stop doing...or start doing. If you get us alone and honest with ourselves, we can reasonably say, "Yeah, I should probably quit drinking". Or we might say, "Yeah, I guess I do really need to start getting to bed earlier."
We typically sell ourselves short when it comes to answers about our lives. It's as though we know the answer deep down – we just need someone to confirm it for us. Once we have that answer, we have a map to follow. Discipline pushes us to take the steps to follow the map to the destination we want to go to.
And guess what? The thing holding you back from that outcome is the area that needs discipline.
Here's How you get More Discipline
Accept that there are plenty of things that are good for you that you don't want to do. And as frustrating as it may be, the road to where you want to go is littered with things you don't want to do. Discipline is as simple as actually taking those steps and obliterating the excuses for why we can't complete the task.
Discipline rejects excuses. Discipline does what is right. Discipline doesn't need motivation.
In fact, if you've known me for any length of time, you know that one of my favorite sayings is: motivation leaves you when you need it most.
It's not about motivation. It's about discipline through the highs and lows.
So, give yourself a break: the struggle is real and expected when it comes to discipline. Don't let anybody shame you for thinking your goals will require doing things you don't feel like doing. Anybody worth their salt with discipline will tell you they don't want to do their thing all the time. But they do it.
In other words, become disciplined by doing what is right and good...not necessarily what you want. Then, when you get to your goals and reach new heights, the same people who told you to not be so disciplined will wonder how you ever got there in the first place.
If you desire to achieve transformation in your mindsets and life, then check us out at The Forged. We've produced powerful materials designed specifically for men. Our resources bring you on a journey of building new mindsets, personal development, and helping you learn and grow with the Lord in ways you never thought possible. Check out what we offer today!
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